HOLY HUMOR
A priest was walking along the corridor of the
parochial school near the preschool wing when a group of little ones were
trotting by on the way to the cafeteria. Little Johnny stopped and
looked at him in his clerical clothes and asked, "Why do you dress funny?"
He told him he was a priest and this is the uniform priests wear.
Little Johnny pointed to the priest's plastic
collar tab and asked, "Do you have an owie?" The priest
was perplexed till he realized that to him the collar tab looked like a
band-aid. So the priest took it out and handed it to Little Johnny, to show
him. On the back of the tab were raised letters giving the name of the
manufacturer.
Little Johnny felt the letters, and the priest
asked, "Do you know what
those words say?" "Yes I do," said
Little Johnny, who was not old enough to read.
Peering intently at the letters he said, "Kills
ticks and fleas up to
six months!
This Christian couple felt it important to
own an equally Christianpet.
So, they went shopping. At a kennel specializing in
this particular breed, they found a dog they liked quite a lot. When
they asked the dog to fetch the Bible, he did it in a flash. When they
instructed him to look up Psalm 23, he complied equally fast, using his paws
with dexterity. They were impressed, purchased the animal, and went home (piously).
That night they had friends over. They were so proud of their new dogand his
skills, they called the dog and showed off a little. The friends were
impressed, and asked whether the dog was able to do any of the usual dog
tricks, as well. This stopped the couple cold, as they hadn't thought about
"normal" tricks.
Well, they said, "let's try this out."
Once more they called the dog, and they clearly pronounced thecommand, "Heel!"
Quick as a wink, the dog jumped up, put his paw on the man' forehead,
closed his eyes in concentration, and bowed his head.
One day little Johnny asked his mother for a new
bike. His mother said,At Christmas you send a letter to Santa to ask for what
you want, don't you?" "Yes," replied Johnny, "but it isn't
Christmas." His mother said, "Yes,but you can send a letter to Jesus
and ask him."
Johnny sat down with a pen and paper and started
his letter: Dear Jesus,
I've been a good boy and I would like a new bike.
Your Friend, Johnny. He thought about this and decided to start a new
letter. Dear Jesus,Sometimes I'm a good boy and I would like a new bike. He
thought about this and decided to write another letter.Dear Jesus, I thought
about being a good boy and I would like a new bike.
He thought about this and decided that he didn't
like that one either.He left and went walking around depressed when he went by
a house with a small statue of Mary in the front yard. He picked up the statue
and hurriedhome. He put the statue under the bed and started his new letter.
Dear Jesus,If you want to see your mother again, send me a new bike! Your
Friend, Johnny.